Draft:Alfred William Tucker

  • Comment: I have declined this for the informal tone ("We pick up the story of Alfred Tucker in early 1881, when he was 25 years old.", etc.), but there are a number of other issues that also need addressing.
    The structure is monolithic, and largely chronological. For clarity and accessibility reasons it would be better to instead divide the content into sections, such as 'Early life', 'Career', 'Legacy', etc. After all, you are trying to write an encyclopaedia article, not a biographical narrative. The first, or 'lead', section should briefly introduce the subject, set the context, and explain why the subject is notable.
    Speaking of notability, it isn't clear what makes this person worthy of inclusion in a global encyclopaedia. Merely having existed is not enough, we need to see something in terms of impact or legacy, as well as significant coverage in multiple independent and reliable secondary sources, either modern or contemporaneous.
    I would also recommend condensing this by concentrating on the most significant facts only, especially those that make him notable, rather than providing a comprehensive log of everything he ever did; the 'less is more' approach, if you will.
    Hope this helps, -- DoubleGrazing (talk) 06:36, 29 August 2024 (UTC)