Talk:Supermarine Sparrow

This review is transcluded from Talk:Supermarine Sparrow/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Sammi Brie (talk · contribs) 00:31, 10 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written. a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): It is factually accurate and verifiable, as shown by a source spot-check. a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism): It is broad in its coverage. a (major aspects): b (focused): It follows the neutral point of view policy. Fair representation without bias: It is stable. No edit wars, etc.: It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate. a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall: Pass/Fail:
· · ·

Some copy changes and an image licensing fix, mostly. 7-day hold to Amitchell125. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 00:31, 10 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]

• It was entered for the 1924 Two-Seater Light Aeroplane Competition, but suffered engine failure during the competition. Remove comma (User:Sammi Brie/Commas in sentences, CinS for short)

Done. AM

• was a parasol monoplane was a heavier and slower aeroplane Redundant

Some of this is needed, as the Sparrow was changed from a biplane to a monoplane when it was redesigned. I've amended the lead to hopefully make this clearer. AM

• In 1923, the Royal Aero Club organised a flying competition at Lympne, Kent, for single-seat aircraft, competed. The following year, Supermarine entered the Sparrow was for the Two-Seater Light Aeroplane Competition This is missing a few words.

Sorted. AM

• , which at 3500 rpm, Add a comma after "which" to complete the appositive.

Done. AM

• designer, R.J. Mitchell and other Complete the appositive with a comma after Mitchell

Done. AM

• a hole a hedge Missing "in"

Sorted. AM

• The three-cylinder radial engine proved to be extremely unreliable and the Sparrow was eliminated This is where you do need a comma (after "unreliable") for CinS reasons.

Done. AM

• During the first lap of the race, the Sparrow overtook a Westland biplane, and maintained The second comma is not needed. Note that there is no subject after "maintained".

Done. AM

• Sparrow II was outclassed, but successfully passed the elimination trials. Remove comma

Done. AM

• It failed to pass the racing starting line; due to poor weather conditions, it made a force landing near Beachy Head on 12 September 1926—Biard noticing that loose rivets were likely to cause the wings to fall off.—and was eliminated from the competition, which was won by the Hawker Cygnet. Consider restructuring. There shouldn't be a period in a clause set off by endashes. Maybe It failed to pass the racing starting line; due to poor weather conditions, it made a force landing near Beachy Head on 12 September 1926, with Baird noticing that loose rivets were likely to cause the wings to fall off. Sparrow II was thus eliminated from the competition, which was won by the Hawker Cygnet.

Done. AM

• Is the Variants section necessary given the contents of the other areas?

There is a voluntary format for these kind of articles, Wikipedia:WikiProject Aircraft/page content, which I would prefer to keep to. Amitchell125 (talk) 08:28, 10 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Earwig turns up no issues. Most of the sourcing is to three offline or semi-offline sources. Searching of Andrews and Morgan 1981 does turn up the items that are mentioned in the citations. The Flight article from 1924 also checks out.

• There are four images. One is from NACA (PD-USGov) and the other are marked as CC; they are copied from various publications in 1924 and 1926. The correct tag for these is {{PD-scan|PD-US-expired}}. This should be fixed. I also suggest adding alt text.

Done. AM

@Sammi Brie: I have addressed the issues you found, thanks for the review. Amitchell125 (talk) 08:51, 10 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]