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Rampage (roller coaster) has been listed as one of the Sports and recreation good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it. Review: August 10, 2023. (Reviewed version). |
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A fact from Rampage (roller coaster) appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 25 August 2023 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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Reviewer: Rjjiii (talk · contribs) 05:48, 30 July 2023 (UTC)
(a) the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct:
Going a bit out of order:
When it opened, the roller coaster was located within the Celebration City section of the park.feels unrelated to other content. It could likely be cut. If there's something significant about this line, it was not clear to me.
The roller coaster reaches a top speedcould use a topic sentence or some kind of signal to the reader. This doesn't need to be additional content. For example, the sentence
Rampage is considered a twister roller coaster because the track's layout weaves through itself.felt like the natural start of the paragraph to me.Rjjiii (talk) 21:00, 5 August 2023 (UTC)
the park continued to observe stagnant attendance into 2000.seems contradictory, maybe just "the park observed..." or even shorten the whole line to "attendance stagnated."
As part of a five-year plan,I don't see a significance to this clause and it made the chronology more confusing for me, because the ride opens the next year.
The renovation saw the replacement of wooden structure and track, in addition to a new train.I did not fully grasp the meaning of that until I read the source, "Over the past six months, the owners of Alabama Splash Adventure have embarked on an extensive restoration project to replace virtually the entire track — including over 1,400 boards and supports — and restore the 28-seat train." The Ship of Theseus-style replacement is definitely interesting but I would reword this. It's easy to take this as either (a) the structure was replaced as-a-whole rather than piece-by-piece, or (b) the wooden structure was replaced with something other than a wooden structure.Rjjiii (talk) 21:31, 5 August 2023 (UTC)
right bankedsuggest: right-banked
left bankedsuggest: left-banked
into dropsuggest: into a drop
dropping to complete a hillI was not sure of the meaning.
where it ascends into a left-banked turn. Continuing the left-banked turn with a series of dips, the train dropssuggest: where it ascends into a left-banked with a series of dips. The train drops
One cycle of the roller coaster took about a minute and thirty seconds to complete.Why is only this sentence in past tense?
near the Birmingham, Alabama areasuggest: near Birmingham, Alabama
with the backing of around a dozen citiesIt's not clear if Longford had the backing or sought the backing from this wording.
In a series of endeavors aimed to establish a Birmingham theme and water park,suggest: omit as redundant
and include a 100-foot (30-meter) drop.Could this be moved out of the price sentence? Maybe into the very next one.
By September, some concrete footings for Rampage were in place, footings were being poured,These sound contradictory?
using bagged oats acting as test dummies.I really liked that detail.
orginal openedoriginally opened
mostly positives reviewsmostly positive reviews
inter-municipal cooperative ownedI would omit this or seek a synonym with less jargon
continued to operatesuggest: operated
And that's it for prose, Rjjiii (talk) 06:30, 8 August 2023 (UTC)
(b) it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation:
(a) it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline:
Yes, breakdown from template:ref info:
Looks good. Rjjiii (talk) 05:57, 30 July 2023 (UTC)
(b) reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose):
Everything that needs a citation has one. The only potentially unreliable source I see is a YouTube POV video but that same passage also has a newspaper citation (reliable, secondary, independent).Rjjiii (talk) 03:59, 2 August 2023 (UTC)
(c) it contains no original research:
"Wooden Wonder: Old-style roller coasters are thundering in for a big comeback". Birmingham Post-Herald. pp. C1, C4. Archived from the original on November 22, 2022. Retrieved November 22, 2022 – via Newspapers.com.It checks out.
Joynt, Steve (May 18, 1998). "VisionLand delivers on its promise". Birmingham Post-Herald. p. A1. Archived from the original on November 22, 2022. Retrieved November 22, 2022 – via Newspapers.com.
John (October 28, 2014). "Rampage Rides Again at Splash Adventure". Coaster101. Archived from the original on November 23, 2022. Retrieved November 22, 2022.
Amy, Jeff (May 21, 1998). "Visionland keeps its eye on the future". The Anniston Star. p. 3E. Archived from the original on November 24, 2022. Retrieved November 24, 2022 – via Newspapers.com.
Staff (July 26, 1998). "Rampage". Birmingham News. p. 1-J – via NewsBank.I'll check this one when I can find it. It's the secondary source paired with the YouTube video.Rjjiii (talk) 03:59, 2 August 2023 (UTC)
(d) it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism:
(a) it addresses the main aspects of the topic:
(b) it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style):
Looks good.Rjjiii (talk) 20:40, 5 August 2023 (UTC)
Yes, only formatting and typo fixes in the past six months.Rjjiii (talk) 05:59, 30 July 2023 (UTC)
(a) media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content:
Yes, public structure photographed by Lewison and released under CC license. Hosted first on Flickr, now at commons.Rjjiii (talk) 06:01, 30 July 2023 (UTC)
(b) media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
Yes, relevant and captioned, Rjjiii (talk) 06:01, 30 July 2023 (UTC)
This may take me about a week to get through. If you like I can ping you as I finish up sections. Also, feel free to let me know if you have anything in particular you're seeking feedback on.Rjjiii (talk) 05:48, 30 July 2023 (UTC)
Staff (July 26, 1998). "Rampage". Birmingham News. p. 1-J – via NewsBank.I wanted to check that one since it's used multiple times and paired with the YouTube video. The other sources that I checked looked good. Rjjiii (talk) 04:01, 2 August 2023 (UTC)
Sounds good! Appreciate the comments so far. I will fix these issues in about a day or so. Adog (Talk・Cont) 19:18, 7 August 2023 (UTC)