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This was never meant to turn into an essay or a Big Deal. However, in September, I decided to reveal to the WP community that I'd been on antidepressant medication, and have had an 'interesting' history regarding depression and self-injury. Another editor, now banned, had decided to take it upon himself to bully me over the fact that yes, I have had a history of depression and that I was popping pills like smarties. Obviously, it was something to be ashamed of and something which made me a lesser person, an unstable and unworthy one.
I decided to tell the truth, then take a break. I'd never have foreseen what was going to happen next.
The community spoke out, and spoke out clearly and pretty much with one voice. Of the list of people below who commented, I see dear friends, strangers and people who are vehemently set against each other - all saying the same thing.
When I came back here, I was just going to delete my public statement, check for fallout and (hopefully) get back to work. However, I'm keeping it here as a message to all others who have been through this too, or are going through it right now. My email inbox is filled up right now with "me too" messages from all sorts of people on here; editors, admins, even two chronic vandals, and all in a very similar situation.
This is what the community has to say;
| “ | It's okay to have suffered from depression. It's okay to admit it. Admitting it, dealing with it and moving on is the right thing to do. People will love you anyway, and they will judge you on what you do and how you interact with others, not by what medications you take or what demons you are battling your life. It's nothing to be ashamed of; it just happens, and it happens to so many of us. We're all around. Really. | ” |
To other people out there who are hiding or are afraid or ashamed of what people might think, or are feeling worthless and unloved, read through the list below, because so many of these good people are also speaking to you.
I want to thank everyone here for being so loving, trusting and supportive of me here. I truly don't know what to say ...
Love you all,
- (A few weeks later, I checked the links below and was surprised to find they had been oversighted - Alison ❤)