I am frequently asked to look at prospective featured articles and advise on how to write them, so I thought it would be clever to have a few of my thoughts on the subject on paper. Especially so, as many people frequently tell me they are not capable of writing a FA or that they are reluctant to nominate one of their pages. Surprisingly, many of these are not newbies but quite established and respected editors. Hence this, my only Wikipedia essay, is not a lecture on how to write perfect prose but an effort to debunk a few of the many myths that surround FAs. It is also a guide to handling the FAC page and process while retaining one's temper, self-respect and dignity. Nothing here should be taken as definitive advice, and I accept no responsibility for anyone's FACs which fail as a result of wisdom shared here: that will be their own fault entirely.
Basically, just remember any fool (even you) can write a featured article. The people who run the FAC page enjoy promoting: they are keen to help. There is nothing to fear there, and it should be an enjoyable experience: do not take it all too seriously, have a go and have some fun. If it all goes horribly wrong, well it took me three attempts to achieve this one. I was so despondent that a friend had to nominate it without my consent. There is always tomorrow.