 First paperback edition | |
| Author | Deborah Tannen |
|---|---|
| Cover artist | James B. Harris |
| Language | English |
| Subject | Language and gender |
| Published | 1990 (Ballantine Books) |
| Publication place | USA |
| Pages | 330 |
| ISBN | 0-345-37205-0 |
You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation is a 1990 non-fiction book on language and gender by Deborah Tannen, a professor of sociolinguistics at Georgetown University. It draws partly on academic research by Tannen and others, but was regarded by academics with some controversy upon its release. It was written for a popular audience, and uses anecdotes from literature and the lives of Tannen and her family, students and friends.
Tannen writes that, from childhood, boys and girls learn different approaches to language and communication; she calls these different approaches "genderlects". According to Tannen, females engage in "rapport-talk" — a communication style meant to promote social affiliation and emotional connection, while men engage in "report-talk" — a style focused on exchanging information with little emotional import. The differences in metamessages, Tannen claims, result in misunderstandings between men and women.
The book remained on the New York Times best seller list for nearly four years (eight months at #1) and was subsequently translated into 30 other languages.[1] It received generally positive reviews, and some readers have even credited it with helping save their relationships.[2] However, another linguist has criticized Tannen's representation of the research she cites as limited and misleading, faulting her for making generalizations and contradictory claims.
- ^ "You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation by Deborah Tannen". HarperCollins. Archived from the original on July 9, 2010. Retrieved February 16, 2011.
- ^ Gamarekian, Barbara (June 19, 1991). "Men. Women. Talk. Talk. Talk. Talk. Talk. Hear? No". The New York Times. Retrieved February 16, 2011.